Profesor Hubert J. Farnsworth
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Episode Transcript: 2acv07 |
2acv07: Put Your Head on my Shoulder From The Neutral Planet [Opening Credits. Caption: Not Based On The Novel by James Fenimore Cooper.] [Scene: Planet Express: Lounge. On the TV the heads of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln sit on podiums in front of a red curtain.] Lincoln: [on TV] Four score and 1145 years ago our forefathers' foreheads conceived a new nation. Washington: [on TV] And this Presidents' Day we honoureth those values that my body fought and died for. [Behind the heads the curtain opens and reveals a car showroom. The salesman, a robot with pieces falling off, points to a car.] Malfunctioning Eddie: [on TV] Values like this brand new Plymouth V'Ger! Hi, I'm Malfunctioning Eddie and I'm malfunctioning so badly I'm practically giving these cars away! Amy: Hey, let's go car shopping! My parents promised if I got all B's they'd buy me a bar, and I got all C's! Bender: Mind if I tag along? I gotta bring my ass in for servicing. [He picks up a recall notice.] The recall notice says it could burst into flames in a low-speed collision. Fry: No wonder you've been staying at the back of conga lines lately. Leela: I'll get my coat. Let's go, Bender. [She taps his ass with a rolled-up newspaper and it bursts into flames. Amy, Fry and Leela recoil in horror.] [Scene: Malfunctioning Eddie's Showroom. A man with an accent introduces himself to Amy.] Victor: Hello, I am Victor and I know many things about the art of unloading fine cars on beautiful women. [He kisses her hand.] Leela: Uh-huh. Now tell us she's witty and sophisticated. Victor: Ah-ah-ah! A gentleman always sells a lady a car first. [He takes Amy over to a car.] This is the Beta Romeo. Yes, the Beta Romeo. Note the cross-your-heart seat belt which protects, lifts and separates. [At the coffee machine Fry pours himself a cup. A salesman puts his hand on his shoulder.] SalesMan: Spotted her the minute you walked in, didn't you, sir? She's a real beauty. Fry: Yup, she's beautiful coffee alright. SalesMan: No, the Ford Thundercougarfalconbird! [He takes Fry over to a car.] Nothing makes you feel more like a man than a Thundercougarfalconbird. So how much were you thinking of spending on this Thundercougarfalconbird? Fry: Sorry, I'm not here to buy. SalesMan: I understand, and it's wonderful you don't care whether anyone questions your sexual orientation. Fry: I care! I care plenty! I just don't know how to make them stop! SalesMan: One word: Thundercougarfalconbird! [Amy and Victor sit in the Beta Romeo.] Victor: The luxurious seats are stuffed with eagle down and the dashboard inlaid with the beaks of a thousand eagles. Also, there are some eagles under the floorboards. Amy: That's an awful lot of eagle. Victor: Yes, and yet-- [He sighs.] Amy: What's wrong? Victor: It is just ... the luxury edition has so much more eagle. It saddens me to think of you missing out. Amy: Oh, don't be sad. My parents are paying and they're incredibly rich. [Victor raises his right eyebrow and pushes it down again with his finger.] [Scene: Service Department. Bender lies on a raised platform and a mechanic drills into his back, causing him pain. The mechanic lowers him to the floor and he gets up.] Mechanic: I installed shock-absorbing bumpers to reduce the risk of catastrophic butt failure. [Bender turns around and gasps at what he sees grafted to his butt.] Bender: You, sir, have defaced a national treasure! I demand you restore my buttocks to their former glory. [He gets back onto the platform.] Mechanic: Alright. But sooner or later that ass is gonna blow, and when it does, I just pray you're not moonin' someone you care about. [Scene: Malfunctioning Eddie's Showroom. Amy and Leela look under the bonnet of the Beta Romeo.] Amy: Smeesh, Leela! This car has everything a beautiful woman like me needs. Victor said so. [Victor chuckles.] Victor: (quietly; to himself) No dog food for Victor tonight. [Leela closes the bonnet.] Leela: OK, the sticker says 55,000, but we'll only go as high as, say-- [Amy puts her hand in the air.] Amy: 60,000! [Leela sighs.] Victor: Oh, I will have to ask my manager. [He walks into Malfunctioning Eddie's office.] Leela: Amy, you don't go up from the sticker price. Amy: I thought it was an auction. [Through the office window, we see Victor say something to Eddie. Eddie smiles and they both dance. Victor comes back out again.] Victor: He is not too happy. Amy: I'm sorry. 80,000? [Eddie's head explodes.] [Scene: New New York City Street. Amy and the others drive back to the Planet Express building. Outside, she prepares to park the car.] Amy: Uh-oh. I'm terrible at parallel parking. [The car moves into a space sideways then shunts two cars in front and behind it.] [Scene: Planet Express Corridor. Fry and Leela walk past Hermes' office.] Hermes: (from inside) And now you're asking for a day off? Get out of my and my sight! [Fry and Leela look at each other and shrug.] You're bogarting my patience. [The door opens and Hermes walks out.] Leela: Hermes, who were you yelling at? Hermes: Myself. I asked myself a Valentine's Day off, but I was in no mood for any of my shenanigans. Fry: Valentine's Day's coming? Oh, crap! I forgot to get a girlfriend again. Well, since neither of us has a date, why don't we...? Leela: You just assume I can't get a Valentine's date? Fry: Shall we say eight o'clock? [Enter Amy.] Amy: Hey, I'm taking my new car out for a spin to Mercury. Anybody wanna come? Fry: Yeah, OK. What's the weather like? Amy: The usual: Boiling lead, oceans of lava. Fry: So, what? Shorts? [Scene: Amy's Car. They drive across the Mercurial surface listening to music.] Fry: Boy, this A.C. is incredible! [He shivers.] I'd better turn on the heater too. [He does and the fuel gauge starts to go down. They pass Hg's Fuel, the only fuel station on the planet.] (shouting) Boy, this heater is incredible! I'd better turn up the A.C. some more. Amy: (shouting) Hey, how about some icy margaritas? Fry: (shouting) Yeah! [He pushes a button and two glasses and a mixer comes out. The fuel gauge drops further.] We're slowing down! Amy: (shouting) Don't worry. I'll hit the fuel guzzler! [She presses a button and the car accelerates.] Fry: (shouting) Who wants pop-tarts? [He puts the pop-tarts in the toaster and turns it on full. The engine stops, the heater and A.C. go off, the mixer stops and the car jerks to a halt, then falls to the ground. Amy gasps and sees the fuel gauge is empty. Fry takes his shades off and sees the sign to Hg's Fuel; 4750 miles one way, 4750 miles the other way.] Uh-oh! Amy: It's OK, I have an emergency phone. [She picks up a make-up case and applies blusher to her cheeks.] Fry: What are you doing? Amy: Spluh! It's a video-phone. [She presses a button on the steering wheel and a screen and dialling pad fold out. She dials.] Lucky I'm a member of the Astro-Afro-Antarctico-Amer-Asian Auto Association. [A man appears on the screen.] Hello? Septuple-A? [The sun beats down on the planet. Beads of sweat pour down Fry's face. He leans back over the seat and pulls the hood over the car.] Fry: Phew! [Amy finishes her call and sighs.] Amy: It'll be a couple hours. Oh, I'm gonna get sweat on my sweat-suit. [She pulls the zip on her top down.] Fry: Hey, tell me something: You've got all this money, how come you always dress like you're doing your laundry? Amy: I guess 'cause my parents keep telling me to be more ladylike. [She scoffs.] As though! Fry: I've been there. My folks were always on me to groom myself and wear underpants. What am I, the Pope? [Amy laughs.] Amy: Yeah, and if you were the Pope they'd be all, "Straighten your Pope hat," and, "Put on your good vestments." [Fry laughs then Amy joins in.] You know, Fry, it's nice to find someone I can talk to about stuff, and junk. Fry: Yeah, it's like we feel the same way about junk and stuff, or, whatever. [He smiles. She smiles back.] [Scene: Mercury Surface. Later, the sun is setting and the Septuple-A recovery truck arrives. A man gets out and sees the car hood is steamed up. He laughs, rubs off the condensation and peers inside. Amy and Fry each hold a hand of cards. The man sighs disappointedly.] [Cut to: Amy's Car. The recovery truck tows it.] Amy: So while they're towin' us, you wanna do it? Fry: Yeah. [They kiss and disappear below the seats. The man laughs again.] [Scene: Planet Express: Meeting Room. The next morning, the staff sit around the table as Hermes presents a chart to them.] Hermes: Which concludes the summary of the movie I saw last night. Now, any old business? All: (simultaneous) No. Hermes: Any new business? All: (simultaneous) No. Hermes Anyone spend the night together? [Everyone except Fry and Amy replies "No".] Amy: Yep. Fry: Kind of. [Everyone gasps.] Bender: What? Hermes: Oh, my God! Amy: We ran out of fuel on Mercury and one thing led to another. Fry: And it led there again when we got home. [He and Amy chuckle.] Bender: Congratulations, Fry, you snagged the perfect girlfriend. Amy's rich, she's probably got other characteristics. Leela: Bender! Romance isn't about money. Bender: Oh, so it's just coincidence that Zoidberg here is desperately poor and miserably lonely? Puh-lease! Leela: For your information, it's because he's hideous. [Zoidberg sighs.] Hermes: Well I think Amy and Fry go together like a lime and coconut. Farnsworth: Do I hear wedding bells? Fry: What? No! Farnsworth: Really? Oh, dear. [He pats the side of his head. Zoidberg sighs.] Zoidberg: You're both very lucky. I'd pay anything to end my miserable loneliness. If only I weren't so desperately poor. Bender: Wait. You mean people will pay good money for romance? Hmm. I think I have a scheme so deviously clever that I-- [Scene: Courtroom. The judge bangs his gavel.] Judge: $500 and time served. Bender: Stupid anti-pimping laws! [He turns to Leela.] Well, pay the man! [He struts out. His two Hookerbots follow him.] Hookerbot: Bender, honey, we love you! Bender: Shut up, baby, I know it! [Scene: Planet Express Corridor. Bender hammers a sign on a door that has "Bender's Computing Dating Service. Discreet And Discrete" written on it.] Bender: Ah, computer dating. It's like pimping but you rarely have to use the phrase "upside your head". Leela: Bender, this is stupid. Why would anyone come to you for romantic help? Bender: Hey! Don't make me go upside your head! [Scene: Planet Express: Zoidberg's Office. Zoidberg files his claws while Hermes knocks on the supply room door.] Hermes: (shouting) Fry! Amy! Put your pants back on! I need a stapler. [He struggles to open the locked door. Zoidberg blocks his way.] Zoidberg: Stop! Stop! If you interrupt the mating dance the male will become enraged and maul us with his fearsome gonad. [Cut to: Planet Express: Supply Room.] Fry: (whispering) It's working, they think we're making out. [They laugh then juggle.] Wait, why aren't we making out? Amy: I 'unno. [They kiss and drop to the floor.] [Scene: Planet Express Corridor. Outside the lounge, Larry, Lou and a saleswoman from Alien Overlord & Taylor queue to use Bender's dating service.] [Cut to: Planet Express: Lounge. Bender has set up his dating service at the table and is about to interview a client.] Bender: OK, Mister...? Zapp: Uh, Smith! Zapp Smith. Uh, Brannigan. Bender: Just check off the things you're looking for in a love partner. [He hands Zapp a sheet of paper.] Zapp: Let's see ... Oh, yes! [He punches out a hole.] Yes, definitely. [He punches out another.] Oh, I'd like some of that. [Another one.] Mmm, I'll just have everything on the menu. [He punches out the rest of the holes and hands it back to Bender.] Bender: Now to run it through our high-speed romance-a-logical data-fier. [He screws up the sheet and throws it in his chest cabinet and imitates a computer by beeping. He then pulls out a random sheet and hands it to Zapp.] Say hello to Miss Right! Zapp: (sexfully) Hello! [He rubs the paper against his chest.] [Scene: Planet Express: Supply Room. Amy and Fry finish making out. Fry gasps.] Fry: Wow! We're great kissers! Amy: Yeah! Hey, later, you wanna drive out to Europa? We could have a picnic and spit watermelon seeds at Jupiter. Fry: Hey, yeah! I used to spit at stuff back in the 20th century. Ah, it's cool how we sort of think exactly alike, and junk. Amy: Yeah. Y'know, Fry, I really like hanging out with you. [Fry is shocked.] [Scene: Planet Express: Hangar. Leela welds a section of the cargo lift while Fry paces backwards and forwards.] Fry: Everything was going great. Then, all of a sudden, she's talking about hanging out. Hanging out? She's getting way too serious. I'm not a one woman man, Leela. Leela: You'll be back to zero soon enough. Fry: Don't you get it? She's smothering me. [Amy walks past.] Amy: Hi. Fry: You see? You see? Now she's bothering me when I'm at work. Leela: Fry-- Fry: I'm doing my job, there's Amy; I spend a few hours selecting a candy from the machine, there's Amy; I wake up the morning after sleeping with Amy, there's Amy! Leela: I think you're over reacting. Fry: Am I? (shouting) Am I? (talking) Face it, I'm a prize catch. [He belches.] I mean, I'm pulling down delivery boy money. Leela: Fry, she's pulling down billionaire trust-fund money. Fry: Then she wants me as a trophy husband. Leela, you gotta come to Europa with us. I can't be alone with her. [Amy arrives with a picnic basket.] Amy: So, ready for a secluded picnic with just you and me? Fry: Hey, you know who loves secluded picnics with just you and me? [He looks over Amy's shoulder at Leela. She shakes her head.] Uh, Dr. Zoidberg. [Zoidberg, scavenging through a dustbin, looks up.] Zoidberg: Did someone say something about a free hot meal? [Scene: Amy, Fry and Zoidberg listen to Scruffy the Cat's Moons of Jupiter as they drive to Europa. They pass the orbiting Monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey which has an "Out of Order" note taped to it and drive across the icy surface.] [Cut to: Amy's Car. Zoidberg eats the contents of the picnic basket.] Zoidberg: Mmm, I haven't eaten since Tuesday! Bird eggs, animal slices ... [He gobbles down the food.] ... dry woven reeds! [He eats the basket.] All gone! Can I drive? Amy: No. So, Fry, you busy tomorrow? I got two tickets to the big ape fight. Fry: Jeez, we're already planning to spend Valentine's Day together. Isn't that enough? Amy: OK, sure. What do you wanna do for Valentine's Day? Fry: Oh, so all of a sudden we're spending Valentine's Day together? Amy: But you just said-- Fry: That's it, Amy, we have to talk. Zoidberg, you drive. Zoidberg: Wahoo! [Cut to: Outside Amy's Car. The car tips as they change places.] Fry: (from inside) Pardon me, excuse me. [Cut to: Amy's Car. Zoidberg is at the wheel while Fry and Amy are in the back.] Zoidberg: Ah, I'll just turn the wheel to maximum fastness! [He turns it. Amy screams.] Fry: Amy, you know how at first you like chocolate but then you start to get tired of it because it always wants to hang out with you? Amy: Huh? You don't like chocolate? Fry: Look, could chocolate just let me finish? Zoidberg: Vroom, vroom! And the winner of the big car race is ... Hot Rod Zoidberg! [He mimes a crowd cheering.] Fry: Amy, what I'm trying to say is, I think maybe you and I should stop-- [Something in the front snaps. Zoidberg has pulled the wheel off.] Zoidberg: Uh-oh. Here, you drive! [He offers the wheel to Fry. The car spins out of control, hitting chunks of ice. It heads straight for a huge mountain of ice. Fry screams and the car crashes.] [Scene: Europa Surface. Fry comes to. Zoidberg looks over him.] Zoidberg: Fry? Are you alright? Fry: Ow! My head is killing me. What happened? Was anybody hurt? Zoidberg: No, no, no, no, no, of course not. Nobody but you. I'm afraid your body was badly damaged in the crash. Fry: How badly? Zoidberg: That's it over there. [He points to Fry's headless body. Fry screams.] Don't worry, I managed to keep your head alive with some quick surgery. [Fry moves his eyes up and down.] Fry: Where is it? [Zoidberg points.] Zoidberg: There. [Fry turns to his right and sees Amy's head. Zoidberg has grafted his head onto her left shoulder.] Amy: Looks like we'll be spending a lot more time together, Fry! [Fry screams.] [Scene: Planet Express: Farnsworth's Lab. Farnsworth and Zoidberg inspect Fry's body. Leela tuts.] Leela: This sort of thing always happens with office romances. Zoidberg: Don't worry, Fry, we'll have your body all fixed up in a few days. [He lifts Fry's body up over his shoulder.] Upsy daisy! [He walks out of the room, hitting the body on the walls on the way out. Fry whimpers.] Fry: Well, Amy, I'll try not to interfere with your life too much. [Amy appears to pick her nose.] Amy: Fry! Fry: Ooh, sorry. I guess I control that arm. [He waves the arm around and hoots.] Amy: So, what was it you wanted to talk about before we crashed anyway? Fry: Oh, that. [He turns and sees Farnsworth sweeping behind them.] Maybe we'd better talk in private. (whispering) I'll meet you in the closet. [Scene: Planet Express: Supply Room.] Fry: Amy, I really like you, as a friend. But I think we're spending too much time together. Amy: You're breaking up with me? Fry: I just think we should start seeing other people. Amy: But, I was really having fun. [She sighs.] If that's how you feel. Fry: I'm sorry, but it is. Amy: Well, whatever. Hey, listen, as long as we're not seeing each other, you mind if I ask someone else out for Valentine's Day? Fry: Huh? Amy: I mean, unless it would make you feel bad, being a third wheel. Fry: Hey, I can get a date too. Now that I'm single, I'll attract all sorts of women! Amy: With my body I think you might only attract one sort of woman. Fry: (happy) Oh! (disappointed) Oh! [Scene: Planet Express: Lounge. Bender drinks from a bottle. Leela sits down and plays with his "Dating Consultant" nameplate nonchalantly.] Leela: So, how's business? [Bender opens his chest cabinet, revealing a huge pile of money. He pulls out a $500 note.] Bender: Are you familiar with my friend Al Gore? I'm tellin' you, losers get really desperate around Valentine's Day. Leela: Yeah, it's pathetic alright! [She whistles. Bender hums.] How much? Bender: 500 bucks. Leela: Done. Bender: Zapp Brannigan OK? Leela: No! Bender: 600. [Cut to: Planet Express: Hangar. Enter Leela who sees Fry and Amy playing table tennis. Fry sees Leela.] Fry: Oh, hey, Leela, uh, can I talk to you for a minute? [He turns to Amy.] In private? Amy: Oh, no problem. [She puts her fingers in her ears and sings to herself in Chinese.] Fry: This is an emergency. Amy made Valentine's plans with some goon and I'm gonna be stuck there, lonely and miserable. Will you be my date, please? Leela: You're too late, Fry. I'm sharing Valentine's Day with a very special man. He's not Zapp Brannigan or anything! Fry: Then I have no choice but to do something so pitiful and embarrassing that I'm ashamed to tell you about it. Leela: Bender's in his office. Fry: Thanks. [Scene: Planet Express: Lounge. Amy continues to sing while Fry does business with Bender.] Bender: I got your hook-up, Fry. Now, my usual fee's 500 bucks, but seeing as how it's you, I'll need it in advance. [Scene: Amy's Apartment. Amy dresses herself while Fry "helps".] Amy: OK, Fry, we're done putting on the bra. Fry: Why exactly did you shave your legs anyway? Are you expecting something to happen with your Valentine's date? Amy: What business is it of yours? Fry: And another thing: You're using an awful lot of make-up there. Amy: This is deodorant. Fry: What does it do? [The doorbell rings. Amy reaches for her dress.] Amy: (shouting) C'mon in, Gary! I'll just be another 20 minutes. Gary: (from outside) I'll be waiting. Fry: 20 minutes? You're practically ready now! Amy: Yeah, but it's good to make them wait a little. Fry: Oh, God, it's true! [Scene: Elzar's Fine Cuisine. Amy, Gary and Fry sit at a table. Fry eats a hamburger.] Gary: That dress looks great on you. Amy: (simultaneous) Thanks. Fry: (simultaneous) Thanks. [He watches the door.] Where is she? Gary: I must say, Amy, you're all made up, just like Fry's date. Get it? [Amy shakes her head.] Amy: Mm-mm. Fry: I've got a date. She'll be along any minute. [Enter Bender with an old woman.] Bender: Fry, look who I found! It's Petunia, your dream girl! Petunia: How's them eats? Fry: Uh-- Petunia: Don't mind if I do. [She puts the hamburger into her handbag.] Kids'll be hungry. Fry: (whispering) She seems a little old for me. Bender: She is well-travelled. And I don't mean she travels a lot! Petunia: Wheels fell off my house. Bender: Now how about a rose for the lady? Five bucks a pop! Gary: I'll take one. Fry: Oh, yeah? Well I want one too. Bender: Eight bucks. Fry: But you just said-- Bender: Demand suddenly skyrocketed. You all saw it! [On another table, Leela sits alone. She sighs. Bender arrives.] Bender: Leela, meet your future husband Sal. [Sal wears blue overalls and has a cigarette in his mouth. He cringes.] Sal: Nice eyeball, eyeball. Leela: Nice ass, ass. Bender: Ooh, sparks! (whispering) Buy her a rose, I guarantee she'll put out! [Sal considers then sits down.] Sal: Eh, I'll take my chances. [Time Lapse. Bender's other clients are also there. Larry eats from Hattie's fork and Zapp makes a toast with his woman who has a five-o'clock shadow.] Zapp: Cheers! "Woman": Cheers! Petunia: So tell me about your prospects. You a good gambler? Fry: Well, ma'am, I-- Petunia: What's your game? Bingo? Keno? Wait a minute! You don't have your own body. Fry: No, but I control this arm. Petunia: Slots player, huh? Sorry, but I think I can do better. [She gets up from the table.] Fry: Wait, come back, uh, darling. Petunia: Can't, hon', I gotta catch my bus back to Nutley. I'd kiss you goodnight but I lost my teeth pulling out a stump. [She walks towards the exit.] Sal: So anyways, Leela, I'd love to take a whack at ya but that 10:15 to Nutley ain't goin' nowheres without yours truly behinds the wheel. Petunia: Excuse me, did you say "10:15 to Nutley"? Sal: Why, yes I dids. [They stare into each others eyes and passionately kiss. Leela turns to Bender.] Leela: (whispering) Bender! Did you just round up our dates at the bus station? Bender: Of course not. Sal: (shouting) Anybodys else for Nutley? [Bender's customers get up and head for the door. Zapp's date also leaves.] Zapp: Baby, wait! You didn't show me your surprise. [Gary has his arm around Amy.] Gary: (whispering) You know what I'd like to do...? Fry: Oh, jeez, get a room! Gary: Maybe later. [Fry is shocked.] Fry: Hey, I have an idea: Let's all go out for ice cream. Gary: Actually, I thought Amy might like to come back to my place for coffee. Amy: I don't really like coffee. Gary: Neither do I. [Fry is shocked again.] Amy: Ooh, I feel a little tipsy! [Fry is shocked again.] Gary: Let me pick up the check. Fry: Nooo! [Gary drops his card onto the check.] That's it I'm gettin' the hell outta here. [He tugs at his head.] Ooh! Ow! [Leela hears Fry and walks to their table just as Amy and Gary are about to leave.] Leela: Why, if it isn't my favourite head on Amy's body: Fry. Fry: Oh, Leela! Amy: We were just on our way out. Leela: Nonsense, the evening's young. So, Gary, what do you do for a living? Gary: I'm a banking industry regulator. [Amy sighs.] Leela: Really? Y'know, I heard that banking industry regulations are really very simple. Gary: Oh, no, that's not true. You see, modern banking regulations are a product of five different regulatory traditions. Six if you wanna get technical. Leela: Oh, I do. Gary: It all began in 1410 when a number of noblemen convened... [Fry and Leela look at each other.] Fry: (whispering) Thank you. [They smile.] [Scene: Planet Express: Farnsworth's Lab. Zoidberg finishes stitching Fry's head to his neck.] Zoidberg: There you are, good as new. Except for your dorsal fin. I'm afraid I couldn't find it after the crash. Fry: Can I live without it? Zoidberg: If you call that living. Farnsworth: I still don't understand why you wouldn't let me graft a laser cannon onto your chest. To crush those who disobey you. [He sighs.] But I guess we're just two different people. [He and Zoidberg leave.] Fry: So, uh, thanks for the ride, Amy. And I hope there are no hard feelings about your date, or stuff. Amy: It's OK, I had fun. And if I ever feel lonely I can just look over at this disfiguring scar and think of you. [They smile. Amy leaves. Fry sighs.] Fry: Well, anyway, it's nice to have my own body back. [He yawns, stretches and pats his chest. He looks down and sighs. Enter Leela and Bender.] Leela: So how's the old corpse? Everything hooked up OK? [Fry stands up.] Fry: Seems to be. My neck's just a little tender. [He touches his neck and kicks himself.] Ow! Cool! [He does it again.] Ow! Listen, Leela. Thanks for rescuing me last night. Leela: Anytime. I actually enjoyed hanging out with you. [Enter Bender, counting his profits.] Bender: Yep, everything worked out great thanks to good old Bender. Leela: Come on! It's not like you intentionally set us up with bad dates so we'd spend Valentine's Day together. Bender: Didn't I, Leela? Didn't I? [He winks and a heart wipe closes the scene but opens up again.] Leela: No! You didn't! You just corralled a bunch of stiffs at the bus station and pocketed our money! Bender: True. But in the end, isn't that what Valentine's Day is really all about? Leela: Yeah. Fry: I guess so. [Bender laughs and puts his arms around Fry and Leela and pats them.] Watch the neck! Watch the neck! [He kicks Bender's ass and it sparks.] Bender: My ass! My beautiful ass! [It explodes.] [Closing Credits.] Written by Directed by Starring Also Starring Guest Starring Transcribed: 17/02/03 |